I've thought of writing a post about this but changed my mind because I thought it might sound a tad arrogant, especially if the results were just minimal.
But come to think of it, it is tokidokiwonder.blogspot.com and not comejudgeme.com , so here , :>
When I was at my heaviest, I was ....... very fat. Being fat.... really dampens your self-image, especially when almost all your girlfriends are not fat/slim. HOWEVER, that didn't motivate me not to pig out and eat unhealthily. Seriously, at one point I thought i'd never lose weight again because I just wasn't motivated enough. I see girls around me (then) ever so conscious about their weight even though i thought they looked fine and they can go about not eating meals and in the end getting stomach cramps or whatever you call it. Geeeez.
So anyway, I've been getting a LOT of people coming to me and saying "You're SO THIN!"
Well, first off. thank you :p, really:)
Second off, no thank you :(
The Thank You's are for the people who are actually happy for me. They needn't be, but at least their comments won't make me feel bad.
The NO thank yous are for people (those that actually know me a tad better) who think I am actually on a diet. Or those go about saying (why) YOU'RE SO THIN (minus the congratulatory tone), and those who think I should stop exercising/eating so little/whatever.
First off, I don't think some people can relate to me. Not when their heaviest weight was.... okay let's not go there. One thing that i really must bring forth is, I'm really happy I met koibito.
You wanna know the real answer? The REAL answer is. i've actually been (gradually) shedding weight since July of 2009. I realised that when I was tryin on an old pair of shorts ( my sister's) that i could NEVER fit in, and....... it did fit! :')
The answer isn't that I diet or any of that shit, it's just that i gradually changed my lifestyle! I moved to my cousin's place in August of 2009 as my house was being reconstructed, and I'm proud to say that since I've been here, I've only cooked mee goreng in the midst of the night less than 5 times! lolololol
And I'm also proud to say since February this year, sometimes i go jogging with Koibito. This is a hugeeee leap for me, considering I NEVER jogged. Although we only go once a week, or maybe a fortnight :( but hey, at least I try.
If it was the old me, I can't even last 3 minutes on the threadmill. Now, i can go for 25 minutes (on a good stamina day) :')
And sometimes when i want to pig out unnecessarily, Koibito gently reminds me, and though i don't succumb to this advice all the time, I listen around half the time. And my whole point is the Graduality of the little changes you make OVER TIME!
I think the person who truly understands my diet (or the lack of it) besides Koibito is Mam. I almost always eat with her in uni and do I ever eat like a sissy diet girl? NO!
I get ......... when those, especially my close ones think that I do. I mean, do you know how many YEARS I have never worn a short skirt or pants to outings just because my legs are TOO fat? Do you know how it feels when you can't really find clothes during Chinese New Year and have to resort to clothes that you didn't really like but they fit better than those that were on the mannequin? *sob
Sometimes, i think people should start being more empathetic.:<
And just like I said, it was a gradual loss (over 11 months!!!!!111). It's just that no one really paid attention. I didn't just wake up one day and lost 4.5 Kilos. And YES, it's ONLY that much.
See, i knew this post would sound weird.:/
I've been in my worst state, that's why I never ever want my friends to be where I was.
That's why you never see me encouraging someone to eat when i know they've already eaten or it's near bedtime.
Like I said, I only listen half the time to koibito, but does that stop him from advising me?
A lifestyle, is a very elusive thing to grasp. You don't just understand your body overnight.
It takes time, and gradualness. That's why you don't see me looking fab like Megan Fox or whatever. And my legs are still pudgy, just that they AREN'T AS pudgy. And I'm happy.
Okay, coming to the end of post, I really hope people could understand ~~
P/S: This is totally irrelevant but i just saw this quote
"The True Measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good."
Bi, you pass you flying colours!!!! :">
Labels: princess rant
This is an awesome makeup base. I've been on a withdrawal from using bb creams (because most of their consistencies are too viscous for my liking and apparently, they seem give this whitish/greyish cast) and liquid foundations (because frankly, i don't bother looking for a foundation because they're too many out there *sad)
SO ANYWAY, i got this as a free sample from a magazine together with the powder foundation *SCORE. ( Flipped a few pages, and i found a Bio-essence bb cream sample! Haha lucky day. Anyway, all i can say is, this makeup base is almost as good as the Anna Sui Clear Foundation primer, which i've never gotten to buy (used my sister's lol) because i just think it's tooexpensive :(
The Anna Sui one has micro shimmers in it and is very light beige in color, and fluid in consistency. It has a nice smell too, may not suit your liking cuz I think I tend to get addicted to weird smells, just like how i got addicted to the odd smell of the Estee Lauder Nutritious Vital Mineral energy lotion. Love that toner!
This one is a tad darker, but still a lovely cream beige that matches my skintone (NC 20??),with no shimmers. Ever so slightly more syrupy than the Anna Sui but still considered fluid. Yay.
Both of these bring a glow to your face and even out skin tone. For good face days, i think i can skip the powder foundation (which i don't apply to my whole face, just the uneven areas) and I'm good to go! (somewhat presentable T3T)
I hope it's not expensive like the Anna Sui one because my wallet is not gonna be happy! Damn those freebies.
I wanna dress up and go shopping and have a fun GDO with sassy girl friends
I wanna be like the Bergdorf blondes and strut down 7th avenue in New York Citehhhh!
I wanna have my whole wardrobe full of Marchesa dresses and gowns cuz they are just out of this world!
Ok too high from getting sleepy. Goodnight.
Labels: fashion
Oh hello
Looks like there's a considerable lack of updates here * shy.
Lol no, there's so much i want to say but sometimes, writing takes a toll on me. I have to update my other blog as well, a requirement for my teaching practice in school, and well, I got...stuck. I don't know, i just have SO many things to say and they’re all over my head and it's overwhelming and I don't know where to start. If you're aware, all the things I usually write are pretty much incoherent and all over the place *shameful
Therefore, as per now, I will just go along with my thoughts for today :)
Well, today marks the day where me and koibito has been together for one and a half years :)
One thing that struck me most, and which I have only come to the realization like, a few days ago, is that, there is SO much to this man than meets the eye.
People who don’t know him well might see him as this quirky, geeky guy and perceive him as “wood”, to synonymise being “boring”.
When we first started dating, I, being overly ambitious, wanted to know All about him. I was, you could say, daunted by the idea that something bad might happen that would corrupt our relationship, and that would be it. Therefore, when I find out something about him as we go along, I well, get smug.
Nevertheless, when I come to think of it now, this is ridiculous, and very much unfair to him. What I have not realized is I shouldn’t be complacent with the supposed superficial construction I make of him at Any one time because there are always, always, more depth to what you expect, especially if you are the aforementioned *people. Furthermore, there are always ebbs and flows in life, whatever it is now, might be different when time passes.
The core issue I’m raving here is, don’t rush. Okay I’m saying don’t rush but maybe I’m still the impatient kind but still, being with koibito has changed a huge part of my life.
Some people laugh at him for driving slow, I once did too. Even if my spatial capability is zilch, I’m kind of a road rage at heart. So the other day I was driving and he was advising me against the speeding and braking. And I was like yeah yeahh. But what he said next really got into me, by doing this, we’re actually burning excess fuel, and therefore, wasting energy and resources. Think Green anyone? Although it’s not like a hardcore thing, koibito was the one who taught me to be Greener, for instance, by not taking plastic bags when shopping when necessary and NOT littering on the streets or sewers. This is the Least a person can do and you might go CHEHH, but hey, at least we try!
his eyebrow is permanently fixated that way
People can laugh at him but it never affects him and he doesn’t find the need to explain himself. That, in my opinion, is what a REAL man should be. Unlike some people (especially guys), who are So easily annoyed by even the slightest trigger, and never lets you off the hook. Oh Blasphemy! Seriously, grow up!!!
the geek and 小女人 haha
This is off topic, but I need to let this out. Even if I may not look the part (goody girl), this does NOT allow losers to grant any notion of me being LESS capable in my academics and especially my CAREER! I know I shouldn’t be angered by this but obviously SOME people need to get educated!
Just because I love dressing up and going to parties DO NOT make me any less worthy than another individual who does not. And yea, there’s no need for me to explain myself but this is MY blog and I will say as much as I want to!
I take great pride in able to educate young students and being able to work with some of the most dedicated teachers ( that I have met in my school) and I will NOT allow losers who obviously know nothing to corrupt it!
Also, I have seen a lot of people complaining about others and one thing I realize is, they never realize about their OWN flaws. I’m not trying to being hypocritical here because honestly, at least I Know what some of my flaws are. And when I feel crappy, I just recluse. Not a good tactic, but better than showing a sour face to loved ones right? I know i'm not a saint, but the Worst thing EVER imo is to boycott the person you hate publicly. I mean, that is pure MEAN.
I believe Everyone should be more introspective. People are so busing keeping up interpersonal relationships and going out and have fun they never really have time to examine their innermost feelings, and it gets buried deeper and deeper and one day they wake up, they’ve become a completely different person (so as they say, “You’ve changed”) :)
So, the bottom line is, Don’t be afraid to just sit down, relax, and Explore your heart!
All in all, I just want to say a BIG thank you to koibito.
I used to think he didn’t understand me at all. But now, I realize, he reads my thoughts really well, and to think that it all started from guessing what I was thinking when I refused to talk.
Thank you for being the most patient being on earth. lol
Thank you for letting me be me. I once asked him this, Would you accept me this way, having tantrums and all?
He answered smilingly, “It’s not a question of would I or would I not, because I already have.”
:’)
Thank you for not giving up on me, when I almost did
the breakfast i made him. oh and i love jollibee:)
Thank you for enlightening me with new facets of viewing things
The Magic Faraway tree outside his house (my favourite children's storybook)
Thank you for being my listening buddy
Thank you for being so kiamsiap so it’s not just a surreal relationship.
There are still a lot left unsaid, tucked in my heart, but the underlying idea is. I love you!
Labels: princess love
I made this video playlist at myflashfetish.com
