What i actually feel deep inside..................and other nonsense

Tuesday 23 December 2014

♥; SSEAYP Sick

How did 52 days pass by so quickly?

I remember back during PDT days.... days passed like weeks for me.

3 months of pdt felt like 3 years.

Looking back at some of my dayre posts I recall how I was at one of my lowest points of my life, lol.

It was a time where I had to balance work and trainings.

Had to wear a headscarf everyday.

I am open to new cultures but you CANNOT force "culture" into a person's life.

Had to travel to and fro my hometown and the training center...1.5 hours apart... close to 12a.m...

Missed important social events with friends and family

Stressed over discussion program trainings

In search of my calling after I left my company

Anyway... that is all in the past now.

Whatever doubts and fears I had about SSEAYP have been washed away into the deep blue ocean (ironically where my heart is)

The first few days of the program was unamusing for me to say the least. I was secretly counting the days when I could get back to Brunei.

However, as time passed, I slowly understood what ex PYs meant by the term "SSEAYP sick".

Heck, I even experienced SSEAYP sick before the program had even ended.

I did not want to leave the ship, leave the special people behind.

I had officially been infected.

This would be a post for another day as I am merely blogging from my phone as I reminisce the SSEAYP moments.

The bottom line is.. SSEAYP is not what I had expected.

It is truly a magical journey for me. Mind the is and not was.

Being able to experience this magical journey is worth every ounce of the pain I had to go through.

I will never forget how immaculate and meticulous the Japanese are

How kind and caring they treated everyone

I will never forget my virgin homestay experiences

How welcoming and accomodating the foster families were

I will never forget the discussion programs

Where we discussed real world issues in such a fun manner

I will never forget the hustle and bustle of SSEAYP life

Where we were swarmed with activities throughout the day

I will never forget the special moments spent with special people...

Moments that will remain in the deep blue ocean through time and infinity ~

Once a PY, forever a PY :')

B56

BPY

41st SSEAYP

Labels: SSEAYP sseaypsick

03:44 Shimmerloved

Wednesday 16 July 2014

♥; Bright lips

Today's sporadical beauty post lol.

Lip and hair of the day.

Lip: Lip palette ordered online- mix of chilli red and hint of magenta

Innisfree plum gloss

At first I posted this on Dayre but I still feel like it's more comfortable blogging about beauty here.

My cousin went "Wahh what happened to you, so red" when she saw me lol.

This is how square our community's perception is towards makeup.

The other day at camp I was drawing my brows ( had really really minimal makeup as it was a camp) and one of my roommates asked me if I was a makeup artist.

Kind of a wtf moment there lol.

I'm not so much into makeup as I used to be but it's still fun to play around with colors sometimes!

A week ago.

Tried to do a clean winged eye with bright magenta plum lips.

Wiped it off as I thought it looked too "made up"

Envy girls who can pull off bright lips actually!

My makeup partner 💕

My two babies 💕💕

17:24 Shimmerloved

Friday 27 June 2014

♥; Good news

Despite not having that much of a positive light in another vital department in my life, I feel much better to receive these two news in this same week.

1. Accepted for a MBA in Monash for 2015.

2. I did it! All that work. I'm now representing Brunei for SSEAYP 2014

I am working hard (with Miss P interrupting frequently) towards my scholarship application.
I might have already failed one of the requirements, which is the IELTS/ TOEFL as evidence of language proficiency. But through tedious trips I've managed to get myself a letter from UBD to certify the language of instruction.
The scholarship procedures are really strict, I don't think the letter would help much but I've gotta at least give it a try.

The sad thing about all these is I have limited people to share it to. Like someone I could tell and he or she would be genuinely happy and proud of me.
But yeah, there are only a limited number of people who fit that slot (thank you!) and even the bf isn't one of them.

Oh Well.
It's my life anyway, so I'll just congratulate myself here haha.

P/S: Miss P is the evil Miss Procrastination

14:50 Shimmerloved

Monday 28 April 2014

♥; AKFF

Time for a check in to this old blog.
I always laugh whenever I see what the stuff I've blogged about him. We've certainly come a long way :')

Anyway, to fess up, only coming in here because I'm procrastinating. Midway revising for my oral and written interview for SSEAYP tomorrow. Honesty I have the attention span of a ... idk. goldfish? Just can't concentrate.
I'd be a dream come true if I get it. 2 months on-board with 300 elite youths from ASEAN and Japan.
HOW COOL IS THAT!!

And I don't know why I'm here now -_____-

Anyway, really miss the whole experience from AKFF - ASEAN-KOREA Frontier Forum.
I really am so lucky to be able to participate in such a honourable event.

Wonderful memories.

Me in Hanbok with sweet Cambodian lawyer to be

At Korean Old Village.

These girls are the noisiest and nicest bunch

We were ecstatic that we've completed the resolutions ahead of time. Dressed up for "award-giving" ceremony and picture taking lol.

Second left, Chair of our Human Rights committee <3 comment-3--="" nbsp="">

The Brunei team

Presenting my part during the model summit

This experience helped to push out of my comfort zone.

I strived to familiarise myself with model United Nations debating style and also cramped knowledge of ASEAN and human rights into my brain everyday.

Everyday I am in awe with some of the participants' wit and speaking skills and I'm glad I had the chance to meet these people in my life.

When I was back in Brunei I honestly didn't know what I was going to do. I felt like I was going to be an outcast in the midst of strong youths and had panic attacks.

So for SSEAYP, I'm having the same thoughts.

2 months - what about my leaves? My salary?

Would I be able to present myself properly as a delegate from Brunei?

Am I good enough?

One strong quote that never fails to motivate me;

"20 years from now you will be more disappointed in the things you didn't do rather than the things you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade winds in your sails.

Explore. Dream. Discover"